Monday, April 8, 2013

Project Runway - Finally On My Own

Happy Monday, Addicts! As much as I love the weekends, it always is sad for the lack of new episodes. Finally we got some new Big Bang Theory and Parks and Rec. I don’t know about you, but I was starting to wonder if they’d come back. And poor, Happy Endings, who knows what will become of them. I know I’ll miss Brad more than any of the others.

Previously on our current show, however, we had a trip to the Guggenheim where the designers were paired up to make a piece of inspired art-wear as well as a companion piece with their own personally designed textiles. Layana and Daniel weren’t happy, while Michelle and Stanley worked in perfect harmony. Richard and WL brought out the worst in each other. There was much frustration and tears from everyone, except for Michelle and Stanley, which is probably why they were the winning team, with Stanley taking home the win for himself. WL and Richard were in the bottom, where Richard finally wasn’t “everything” and was reduced to nothing.

While I appreciate the model’s job on the show, I don’t really feel it necessary for Heidi to tell me what prize they win every week. I don’t care. It’s not about them. I mean good for Lifetime for giving them a prize as well, but I don’t really care.

Anyways, Tim tells the designers (post Richard leaving) that the Heidi wants them back on the runway in about 10 minutes. We don’t even get a new Heidi dress to criticize. Shameful. She tells the designers that it’s about time that they work on their own. But wait, I thought this was season teams! And it still is. They’ll be paired with sewing assistants. I don’t think I can call them seamstresses anymore. Obviously we already know that they will be the previously eliminated contestants, especially since we already saw them in the preview from last week. They shouldn’t be surprised.

The designers head with Tim to the Hearst Building, which looks like the American version of the Gherkin in London. Everyone can feel the inspiration from the building. This is where Marie Claire is headquartered, which is why we see Nina. She tells them about how not only is the magazine about the fashion; it’s about the young celebrity. The designers will be creating editorial fashion for a certain celebrity for their May issue.

Jordana Brewster. Daniel tries to tell us he knows who she is, as does Stanley. I highly doubt they knew who she was. Someone handed them an IMDB page. Nina gives the designers some very specific notes.

1.       No red carpet looks
2.       No gowns
3.       No t-shirts and pants
4.       Needs to be editorial
5.       Needs to be bold in either  
a.       Color
b.      Shape
c.       Print
d.      Silhouette

It needs to be something that’s not being worn right now, something that will be worn soon. We get also get notes to not disappoint or embarrass Nina. Tim gives them a product placement pitch for their HP tablets. Stanley doesn’t give a shit, he’s sticking with regular old paper.

The designers get $250 for their look and head off to Mood. Daniel once again picks an extremely harsh, bright color. I guess that’s technically going with what Nina asked for, but good hell is that a eye stabbing color. Michelle’s claws come out a bit by saying that Daniel will do some sort of jacket and Stanley will do something that was already designed in the 1950’s. Harsh, but then again, also true. She says she’s going to make a pair of huge pants and the “weirdest little t-shirt you’ve ever seen.” Wait…wasn’t that number 3 of Nina’s Don’t list? That feels like a bad plan.

In  the workroom our sewers (not the pipes full of poop) arrive. Every single designer gives an interview about how they don’t want to work with Richard. I can’t blame them. Dude crashed and burned; hard. Stanley gets to pick first since he won the last challenge and he goes with Tu. Dafaq? Did he not see any of the season? I don’t ever remember Tu making anything that was done particularly well. He seems to think that Tu was a great tailor…he must be watching a different show. The button bag gets pulled out  and Michelle complains loudly. Despite this, her name gets called first and she jumps up and down and calls Amanda over. That was the only person she wanted to work with. Daniel goes next and picks Samantha, then Layana gets picked and WL face drops. Layana takes Kate and this means we get a repeat of last week.

WL is NOT amused. Richard couldn’t give a shit, because he’s got nothing to lose. Everyone feels bad for WL, including herself. Tim tells them this is an opportunity for them to heal and repair. I don’t think so, Tim. I see this being a total repeat. As they get to work, WL tries to explain what she wants Richard to do, because, you know, that went so well last time. She asks him if he knows how to do a French seam. Having only the experience of my Home EC class in high school, I had to look it up. Based on the video of it I watched on YouTube, it shouldn’t be that hard. WL then decides she needs to simplify it as much as possible so that Richard can execute her design.

Stanley is making the patterns for the jacket and then Tu is supposed to cut and sew. Stanley is getting rather OCD and perfectionist about his piece. Tu seems a little worried for himself. Stanley actually comes over and tells him how wrong and terrible his work is. Yikes.

Tim comes in for his visit and starts with Michelle. She describes the top as partially see-through so the model will be wearing a black bra underneath. Tim seems worried that Michelle isn’t going to make her own bra, but is purely relying on whatever the model brings. It’s a valid point. I do have to say that Michelle’s color pallet has been fairly entirely the same; a form of chartreuse green. I like the color so I don’t hate the idea, but looking back, yeah it’s all been sort of the same.

Daniel is describing his look and it’s all very Daniel. It’s got really structured shoulders, and based on the linen fabric for the shorts, Tim advises his model not sit down. It’s all pretty boring.
Stanley marvels Tim with all the work he’s attempting to do. Tu doesn’t say anything, which goes along with what his script has been all season.

Layana gets all positive reviews and we don’t want to talk about her anymore. WL however is having issues. She tries explaining her vision to Tim and even he struggles with it. She talks about making a cape. Did we learn nothing from Edna Mode (from The Incredibles which is shockingly 9 years old, and who was also shockingly voiced by Brad Bird!)!? No capes! She says she feels better after talking to Tim, but I’m sure once he leaves the room all the fear will come rushing back in.  She asks Richard to do French seams and he’s a deer in the headlights.

She is literally teaching him how to do it, which of course will lead to her just doing it and him sitting and watching. This realization is hitting her. “I’ll just sit here with you. I feel like I’m taking a class, you’re educating me so much!” Guy, that’s not why you’re here! You maybe at Parson’s, but this is not the classroom!

Stanley is standing over Tu like an overseer and barking instructions and telling him how horrible he’s doing. The poor man is spinning around like a crazy person. Things are tense with them. And I’m fairly certain that Stanley isn’t aware of how much of an ass he’s coming off as.

WL and Michelle’s models are conversing (did you know they could talk?) and WL’s model points to Daniel’s model in his jacket and shorts and asks if the other model likes it. To be polite she smiles and shakes her hand in a so-so gesture. I think she would’ve been much more honest had she not been on camera. WL model laughs and agrees it’s crap. It has to be pretty bad if even the models are talking trash about it in the work room.

WL is now on revision #4. That’s not an exaggeration. She has changed concepts that many times. She has a tube, and that’s about it. She breaks down and cries in an interview. If I didn’t hate her so much, I might even feel sorry for her. I wonder if Richard was one of the fake out designers that shows at Fashion Week to throw off the media about who really was in the finals.
Pointless hair and makeup consultation. WL has decided to go back to the reservation and make fringe. Good hell. Why? It doesn’t even look like good fringe, it looks like a tacky last minute costume addition. Daniel finishes a little early and Samantha goes over to help WL finish her piece. That was overly nice of her.

Heidi once again has a modestly cute dress. I would wear that. Not that I have the body for it, but I would try! The judges include our long lost Zac Posen, Nina, and the celebrity in question, Jordana Brewster. She is beautiful and has a sickening body.


I love it. I love love love it. BUT, it’s not editorial. It’s an awesome high-fashion piece, but it’s still pants and a t-shirt. But I would rock that outfit, again, if I had the body.


It’s yellow, with wings. I also don’t like that you can see the closures on the front. It looks like the top is too small, and there’s a weird moment of mid-rift showing.


It’s stunning. It’s beautiful. Those pants are awesome, that jacket is super. Love it.


Nope. Bad. Awful. It’s a trash bag with shitty fringe sewn on.


It’s cool, but I feel like the flowy skirt on the bottom is mismatched. It also looks handmade, which is both good and bad. It’s a little too crafty for me.

Everyone is going to be talked to today, which I think they’ve done for a while now. WL is up first and she admits that she struggled quite a bit. She gives some bullshit about the celebration of spring and the fringe being connected. Nina says she always has an element of surprise, but that the dress is not editorial, that it wouldn’t be good on Jordana and it has no shape. Posen said he saw no movement in the dress when it walked and is unfinished. Jordana agrees that it’s shapeless and unfinished. Heidi of course likes it. She sees that it’s a good pallet to work with and that a stylist could save it. WL admits that working with Richard was a huge issue because she had to teach him to do everything.

Stanley is next.

Just to give you a better idea about the real shape of the pants. They’re called culottes (I’ve learned so many new things in this episode!) and they are huge but deceptively small at the same time. I feel like this could potentially hide fatness, which would be good for me, but it could also make you look huge. Nina is a fan of everything, and she’s a hard one to impress when it comes to pants. Heidi thinks it’s fresh, elegant and expensive looking. Stanley does give Tu the credit on the jacket. Jordana loves the pockets and length and the versatility.

Daniel is next and he remembered Nina’s words of fantasy, bold and color. The wings apparently are moldable. He also took into account that she should be able to be photographed at all angles. Heidi has memories of Victoria’s Secret with the wings. Posen doesn’t like seeing the closures being visible either. Jordana loves the color and the back of the top. They agree it would’ve been better with a  simple skirt. Nina tells him it would definitely be on the rack of items to be considered. So he didn’t miss the mark as much as I thought. She does give him grief that it looks a little Easter-y. Posen for some reason sees Star Trek. What?

Layana gets judged next. We hear again that she loves hard and soft together. Posen says he’s really proud of her. He calls the neckline interesting (…ok). Jordana loves the color and shape. Nina loves it all around. Heidi thinks it would photograph well. I’ll be annoyed if she wins.
Michelle admits she went a little more casual. She says she wants her look in her closet. Heidi says she is shocked at how skilled she is with her sewing. Nina doesn’t think it’s strong enough to be editorial and calls her out for not listening about the no t-shirt and pant idea.

Is Michelle faking surprise? Or did she just actually not hear that part? “I did exactly that, didn’t I?” Nina says it’s not special enough for this editorial. Jordana would love to wear it, but it’s not editorial. Nina says that when making a magazine you need to have a balance of fantasy and reality with the clothes, and this look has no fantasy.

The judges repeat themselves and I will be annoyed if Layana wins and Michelle goes home. I want Stanley to win and WL to go home. In the waiting room WL admits she already knows she’s going home. Good, pack up your shit and go. Michelle is uncomfortable showing emotion in front of other people so she’s stressing.

The designers assemble for the winner and elimination. The winner is announced as Stanley! Yay! He deserved that win. He may have been an ass, but that outfit was outstanding. Jordana tells him she’ll make his piece look really good. Layana is called safe, followed by Daniel. Really? Lame. So it’s between WL and Michelle. I think Michelle should stay. WL is called first. And she’s called…in!!??! WHAT?! NO!!!! Michelle! She’s so much better! When WL walks back into the waiting room she’s already in tears but chokes out that she’s safe. Everyone is shocked.

For real. This is ridiculous. I call bullshit! Total and utter bullshit! Layana can hardly believe it.
Michelle is back on the runway waiting for her auf. “You’re getting a do or die moment.”

What? Is this like in all-stars where they had 30 minutes to completely change their look on the runway? Heidi says they’re about to send her home, but she gets one last shot and they’ll tell her all about it in a little bit? Seriously? This is stupid. She walks in and everyone shouts, “You’re in!” Ha! They all know WL is worst.

This is dumb. This is a cheap trick to make us think that Michelle has any real chance of being eliminated against WL. Right? Or am I just too hateful against WL and am unwilling to accept the fact that she will probably win. Ugh, that would ruin my day. I’m also very curious what her challenge will be.

Next week, Lifetime decided to blow all their money and are sending each of the designers to a different country for inspiration. We see WL in Paris and Stanley in London. I’m assuming someone will be going to Italy as well and maybe Spain or Greece? We don’t see Michelle at all, obviously to keep us in the dark about whether or not she gets to stay. I hope she does.

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